struggling to connect

i have this thing with my clients i train em but sometimes it goes beyond that one girl in particular she's like a little sister to me we call each other mom and baby its consensual ofc nothing weird or illegal just adult stuff yknow? been doing it for years now but lately ive been feeling really down its hard bcos shes not the only one with issues everyone keeps asking if im ok but i dont know how to say it w/o sounding crazy like how do u tell ur boss u feel like a daddy figure for yr client and sometimes that means more than just being their trainer? ive tried talking to her abt my feelings once she kinda said she thought of me as a mom too but she wasnt ready to go deeper with it yet i dont wanna push too hard but its so frustrating bc we work together every day its like an unspoken thing between us and no one else gets it. im scared if i say anything more out loud itll all fall apart.