feeling lost

i met this older guy online who really understood me, he was in his 60s and had a thing for ageplay and dominance stuff. it started as harmless chats but we ended up meeting up once, i went all in, let him call me girl and give me orders like a little one. felt good to be taken care of for once, even though my marriage's been kinda rocky lately. now i dont know if im just seeking an escape or if its something more serious. i still talk to him but am terrified to cross that line again cos im married with responsibilities. anyone else ever struggle like this? is it normal to crave a daddy figure when your husband cant fill that role?