Confessions of Loneliness and Discovery

I've been married for ten years now, and everything has been going well. Or at least that's what I thought until recently. It started with a movie - one where the main character was in a relationship that involved elements of role-play and discipline, something my husband would never be interested in exploring. As I watched it, a strange feeling washed over me, like I'd been missing out on some hidden part of myself all these years. The next day, I found myself searching online for more information about this kind of lifestyle, and before long, I stumbled upon DDLG/kink content. It was shocking at first but also strangely familiar. I started to wonder what it would be like to explore a side of me that had always been hidden away, tucked into the back of my mind where no one could find it - until now. The more I read and learned about DDLG/kink dynamics, the more intrigued I became, but there's this part of me that feels lost too, wondering if anyone else out there is like me, dealing with these hidden desires while living an otherwise ordinary life. It's been a lonely journey so far, but also one full of curiosity and exploration. And tonight, after reading some more posts here, I realized how much it means to know that others might understand this part of me too. So here I am, reaching out in the hopes that someone else has walked this road before or is walking alongside me now. Is there anyone who understands these feelings and wants to share their experiences? Are you out there somewhere?