just realized something about myself

so i've been dating this girl for a few months and we get along great but lately i feel like there's more to it. yesterday after hanging out at her place, she was trying to convince me that i should try spanking as a way of discipline during sex. i know what you're thinking, kinda weird right? but honestly it felt really good to be in control even if it was just for fun. we ended up doing it and wow, i got super turned on by having her over my knee and hearing her moan out all this naughty stuff while i did it. after that she asked me what other kinds of dominance i liked and suddenly i couldn't stop thinking about being more in charge. i'm still trying to figure everything out but the idea of bossing someone around like that, or even being on the receiving end sometimes when we switch up roles gets my heart racing now. it's a weird mix of feelings really. i want to be more dominant but also there are times when just knowing she can take control and teach me something new is exciting too. doesn't matter if i make sense or not, i think this is the beginning of understanding what kind of kinky side i have.