i admit it

so this is really hard to write but i gotta get it out. i'm a 20 something nonbinary person and we have this deal with my partner where they're like the enforcer, you know? and i try to be good but sometimes... well, here's what happened. we were supposed to go grocery shopping last weekend because our fridge was empty and i had work that week. so i told them it would get done by friday morning, but it didn't happen. i just kept putting it off till monday or whatever. then when my partner found out they went all serious on me, saying how disappointed they were and stuff. i got a bit of a lecture about responsibility and being accountable for my actions. we had this agreement in place because i sometimes need that kind of guidance and discipline to stay on track with things. i felt bad enough at the time but now it just feels worse somehow. i mean, it wasn't like it was something big, right? groceries. still, i broke our deal. and then there's another thing too - i kinda lied about doing laundry last week. i promised them i would do it one night after work and instead i played video games for hours instead. so now my clothes are all wrinkly and stuff piling up again. telling this feels like a weight off, but also makes me feel really stupid and childish somehow. maybe i should just suck it up and take the consequences without whining? still trying to figure out how to earn back their trust after breaking these small promises.