Confessions of a Little Nurse

So yeah, I've been nursing for ten years now and it's always been my dream job. But lately, something's changed. It started with a new patient who was just like the kids I used to look after back in day care, all scared and confused but also so trusting. It made me feel this overwhelming urge to take care of them and make everything better, even if it wasn't really my place anymore. Anyway, one night, I found myself dressed up in some old baby clothes from my sister's kids. They were too small now for her grandkids, but just right for me. It was like stepping back into that day care room all over again, the way everything smelled, how quiet it felt after being at work all day. I didn't mean to start touching myself while I was in there though. Not really thinking about anything except feeling small and safe inside those clothes. But my hand just kind of wandered down, like it always does when I'm stressed out or confused. The sensation hit me hard, more than usual, I guess the whole setup made everything feel amplified. The next day at work, one of the nurses saw a bruise on my leg and asked what happened. I panicked for a second but then just said I was clumsy. Looking back, it probably wasn't even real, just some kind of physical reaction to all this mental stuff going on with me now. I've been trying hard not to think about it, just getting through each day as usual and hoping it'll pass soon. But honestly, I don't know if that's possible anymore. It feels like there’s a whole other part of me waking up, one that was always there but got buried under years of responsibility and professionalism.