Admitting to Myself

I recently had this overwhelming urge to submit in ways I never thought possible. It was a strange feeling, like being lost and then finding my way home, but instead of comfort, it brought me loneliness. Lately, I've been experimenting with the idea of letting someone else be in charge, just for fun and excitement. The other day, when we talked about roles during our session, something shifted inside me. It was like admitting a secret to myself, I felt a mix of relief and sadness that my kink had finally revealed itself. Despite everything, there's still this lingering feeling that maybe it shouldn't be here. I'm trying to embrace it, though, because pretending otherwise feels even more isolating.