just found out i might be into this stuff

i got divorced like 6 months ago and just now started thinking about maybe being into some kinda bdsm or dd/lg stuff. yeah it's weird to admit even here but honestly i've been feeling really lost since the split. my ex was never into anything like that and we had our reasons for parting ways, so i just kept pushing all these thoughts aside. but last week i went on one of those online forums where people talk about kinks and stuff anonymously and saw threads about little space roleplay and vanilla daddy stuff...and i kinda got sucked in. felt like this place was telling my story for me. i read through pages of stories and advice and comments from other folks who were just discovering their thing too, and it really spoke to me. but now what do i do? go down that rabbit hole feels wrong somehow but ignoring it is eating at me inside. seems silly cause im 35 now not a kid anymore but the idea of playing some sort of subservient or little role turns me on in ways nothing else has ever did before. im just so confused and unsure, like am i really ready for something this out there? would people even wanna be with someone who needs that kind of care?