Lost Innocence Long Ago

I'm fifty-two now and my body betrays the years even if my mind still wanders into that realm of youthful fantasy. Last night, I found myself in a situation that brought back memories, but also highlighted how much has changed since then. My partner is new to me, older too at sixty-five, but he's never asked for anything more than tender and intimate encounters, until last week. He proposed something unconventional, something that made my heart race with both excitement and dread. We role-played a scenario where I was younger, and he was the dominant figure guiding me through an initiation of sorts. It was exhilarating in a way that surprised even me, my body responded to his dominance with a fervor I hadn't felt since long before adulthood. But there's this lingering sadness too; it feels like every time we explore something new, there's a part of me that mourns the loss of innocence and simplicity from decades ago. Is this normal? Can age be a barrier or just another layer to play with? I don't want to stop, but I also worry about losing touch with reality. What do you think?