i just dont know anymore

so like i work at this coffee shop and its been going on for a while now. one of the regulars, lets call him jack, he's in his thirties, comes in every day and orders espresso and talks to me. at first it was just friendly chat but then we started hitting it off more and stuff. he's always super polite but there's this vibe that i dont know how to describe, its like hes trying to be a dad figure or something but also like kind of bossy in a way thats not normal. last week he asked if we could do some roleplaying where hes my father and im... his child, i guess? i was so shocked because i never thought about that before. i mean, dont get me wrong, it turns me on but its also confusing as hell. like why now after all this time? how would i even explain this to anyone else if they found out? what does this say about me? and the physical stuff is intense too, hes super demanding and controlling but in a way that feels kinda right with the roleplay. we've done some pretty hardcore stuff already, like spanking and bondage and all kinds of things where he's totally in charge. i feel so dirty talking about it though, its not even just the sex part, its everything. is this normal? am i crazy for liking something like this? im scared to tell anyone because i dont know how theyll react but im also terrified if i keep hiding it from myself too long something bad might happen.