Caregiving Gone Too Far?

I'm a doctor by profession and have always had this innate urge to take care of others. Ever since I was young, there's been something about nurturing and protecting that draws me in. It didn't take long for my desire to morph into something more specific, being the primary caregiver in any relationship I form. A few years back, I met Alex on a dating app. He seemed like a regular guy with interests similar to mine: music, hiking, cooking together. As we got to know each other better, it became clear that he needed help organizing his life and making healthier choices, something I was all too willing to provide. We started out slowly enough, but soon I found myself taking over more aspects of our relationship until finally, Alex began to rely on me for everything from waking up in the morning to figuring out his career path. He'd ask about mundane things like what shirt to wear and if he was eating properly. It all felt natural at first, him asking and me helping. But as months turned into years, I noticed a shift in how Alex spoke about us. He would call me his 'caretaker' more often than 'partner.' This bothered me but also thrilled me in some sick way because it played right into my deepest fantasies. Then came the night when things crossed a line. We were watching TV and he asked what to eat for dinner without even looking up from the screen. That was too much, not because I minded taking care of him, but because we had lost any sense of equality in our relationship. I told Alex that we needed to talk about how I felt: suffocated by his dependence on me. He listened and agreed, promising to start making decisions independently again. But a few weeks later, he slipped back into old patterns. Every time this happens now, I wonder if it's because deep down inside him, or even mine, we want this dynamic. It feels twisted but also oddly satisfying. Am I the asshole for not stepping away from such an unhealthy power imbalance? Or is Alex wrong for letting me take over his life so completely?