A Moment Of Weakness...

I was at this party last night... and I don't know what came over me. I met this girl... she's in her twenties too, but there was just something about her that made me feel like... a different person. We ended up going into one of the bedrooms... it wasn't exactly consensual from my end, more like I felt pressured by some kind of power dynamic we got into... It was weird and uncomfortable, but also strangely thrilling at the same time.... She was in control, telling me what to do, how to act... It made me feel small... submissive. Afterward, I felt so ashamed... Like a part of me that I thought was gone forever came back.... What if she tells everyone? How could I let myself be pushed into something like this again? ...