The Day I Broke Myself In

I’m thirty-five years old now, but this week has felt like an eternity of following rules and ticking boxes. Then came Wednesday — a day when everything changed in my headspace. I broke a tiny rule we have about bedtime snacks; it wasn’t much, just eating a bit of chocolate instead of the usual healthy stuff when my partner tells me to go to bed early for rest. In the moment, I felt this incredible rush of freedom and joy — like breaking one little thing led to breaking free from all my grown-up responsibilities too. It was exhilarating but also frightening because it made me question everything else I’d ever agreed upon in our dynamic. Wasn’t that what being small was supposed to be about? Letting go, finding peace in the simplicity of a moment’s pleasure despite knowing better. This isn't just about chocolate or chores — though those little things can trigger such big feelings inside.