A Professor's Secret Shame

I am a professor in my forties who has always prided myself on being professional and ethical. But there’s something I’ve been hiding from everyone, even from myself for years. A few months ago, I started to explore the dynamic of playing as a little under guidance from an experienced DLG partner. It began innocently enough, with some playful teasing and role-playing exercises online. But as time went on, I found myself deeply attracted to being cared for like a child again. We would meet in person occasionally when schedules allowed, and each session felt both thrillingly naughty and strangely comforting. Yet part of me is terrified others will find out or that someone might judge my choices harshly. Can anyone relate? How do you handle the fear of being judged while exploring these intimate dynamics?