A Secret from the Past Professors Don't Talk About

I've been married to my husband for nearly twenty years now, and we have a wonderful family. I lead a respectable life as an esteemed professor in our local university, teaching generations of students about the importance of ethics and responsibility. But there's one secret from my past that haunts me still, a secret I thought was safely locked away forever. When I first started dating my future husband, back when we were both eighteen, we had a brief encounter with something more intense than just romance. It was during an intense moment of exploration and youthful curiosity, where we roleplayed as older figures and their younger counterparts. We explored the dynamics of power and control in a consensual way, which I now realize fits into what adults call DDLG play. But admitting this to myself is like pulling off a bandaid, painful and unsettling. It wasn't something we continued after that one night; it was more a passing fancy from our adolescence, a fleeting moment of rebellion against the monotony of our early relationship. Yet, it's stayed with me all these years as an unspoken shadow in my otherwise bright life. I've never shared this with anyone else before, not even him. It feels like such a betrayal to who I am now, and yet, isn't that what being honest is about? That one secret encounter seems so small compared to the mountains of love we've built over decades, but it's there nonetheless, a whisper in the wind of my memories.