new to this stuff

so i started law school this year and things have been crazy busy. met this girl online, she's a lot older than me but we connected on some kink boards and stuff. never tried anything like that before though so i was super nervous. one night we agreed to meet up at her place for what she called 'discipline training' - no idea what it would be like honestly. she had this really strict demeanor, told me to strip down and address her as mistress or ma'am from then on. i felt kinda foolish calling an adult woman that but also weirdly turned on by the roleplay stuff. we did some bondage play, i couldn't really tell if she was into it or just pushing boundaries. then there were these toys - clamps and stuff, definitely not what i expected. everything so loud and intense, me whimpering and begging for relief. i ended up crying a few times too but also getting super hot from all the pain play. afterwards we cuddled and talked about it like grown ups and i felt kinda ashamed but she said it was okay to explore stuff. never tried anything like that before so still processing everything really. don't know if i'd want to do more with her though, not sure if i can handle it again. just a weird night i guess.