Admitting My Secret Crush On Dominance

So I just got out of a long-term relationship and it's been hard. The breakup was mutual but it still feels weird to be alone after so much time together. But you know what, in the midst of all this loneliness? I've started to realize something about myself that makes me feel both scared and excited at the same time... I think I might actually have a thing for DDLG or dominance/submission stuff. No joke. Yeah yeah, I know it sounds silly when you say it out loud like that but here's what happened, I was on a date with this guy last week and he started talking about how much he likes being in control of everything from the little details to big decisions. And somehow his talk just got me all hot and bothered for some reason. It was weird, because normally I'm all about equality and sharing power but hearing him go on made something inside me flip. So naturally I left that date early, rushed home and locked myself in my room feeling like a complete mess. Like, what's going on with me? Do I secretly want someone to take charge completely, just for fun once in awhile? Is there some deep-seated need here I've ignored this whole time? The more I thought about it the more conflicted I got. But then the other day I ran into an old friend at a cafe and we were talking catch-up style when he mentioned that his current partner is really into D/s play. And he just said it so casually, like no big deal or anything. That's when something clicked for me, maybe exploring this kink of mine isn't as weird as I was making it out to be? Maybe if the right person came along... Sorry, getting off track now. Back to my own story though... So yeah, there I am thinking all these naughty thoughts and fantasizing about being led around by someone stronger than me. Like how I imagine them giving strict orders and taking complete control of the situation. And while it's scary as hell, part of me wonders what that might feel like in real life if it ever happened. Of course, my brain is also full of worries, about how to even bring something like this up with someone? How do I figure out a safe way to explore my desires without getting hurt or hurting anyone else? It's complicated. But for now, just admitting that possibility exists inside me feels freeing in some way too. I guess what I'm trying to say is... maybe I'm not quite as normal as I thought I was. And there's nothing wrong with that, right?