Conflicted and Curious

I'm thirty-five now, been married for ten years, but there's this thing I've been into that my husband doesn't know about. Sometimes when we're out or just hanging at home, I feel this urge to act like a little kid, clumsy, giggly, in need of constant reassurance from him. He’s never said anything, but sometimes I see this flicker in his eyes like he knows exactly what's going on. It started maybe four years back when we hit that rough patch and needed something new to spice things up. I tried being the 'little' one in a roleplay scenario once, thinking it would be funny or silly. But there was this rush of relief and comfort as soon as I pretended to be a child. The feeling hasn't gone away since. So here's where I get confused: why do I feel like this? Is it just for fun, or is there something deeper here that I'm not seeing? When we cuddle on the couch and I snuggle into him like I need his protection, is that my own insecurities playing out in a twisted way, or am I truly drawn to that feeling of dependency? Or maybe I just want to feel less responsible for everything once in a while. I've tried reading up online about this kind of stuff, people who switch between dominant and little roles. It seems common enough, but every time I try explaining it to myself, my mind keeps going back to the same question: is this okay? Am I fine for seeking that feeling when we're playing around or talking about deeper issues in our relationship? Does anyone else out there feel like they can't figure out why certain things make them tick? Would love some advice on how to explore these feelings without pushing my husband away.