pondering my switcheside

hey everyone i have been thinking a lot lately about why i sometimes like playing little or being the caregiver in these dynamics. it feels kinda weird to admit this but there are moments where i feel so safe and protected when im taking on that role of just being the little one, it's like all my responsibilities melt away. then other times i really get into being the one in charge, making sure everything is perfect for my partner, kind of like a parent or guardian would do. i know its weird how i flip between these two sides but honestly i think it helps me balance out the rest of my life better somehow.