new at this...

hey everyone i just broke up with my long term bf and started going to therapy to work through it. my therapist suggested exploring bdsm stuff as a way to process the pain from the breakup, you know? so i signed up for this site to try some roleplay stuff but its all confusing me honestly. i met someone online who seems like they might be a good fit - she says shes 18+ and into helping people work through their feelings through consensual play. we started texting about it and i kinda got excited, thinking maybe this would help my healing process. then last night... well we talked for a while and there was some stuff over video chat that felt really intense but also kind of weird and new. i'm not sure if what we did is normal or right. i feel so embarrassed admitting even this much but it seems like everyone here is super into the kink stuff in ways i just can't relate to yet. am i supposed to be enjoying this more? should i keep trying? im so unsure and ashamed of how little i know. please let me know if anyone else felt like this starting out.