finally admitting

ive always been this weird art person yeah you know like paint and sketches but i started doing some digital stuff too just for fun. i got into this community online where artists talk about stuff that inspires them and one day a guy said something really interesting it wasnt about drawing or painting at all but he mentioned some kink thing that intrigued me. its hard to say why exactly it made such an impression on me but it did. after that thread ended i kept thinking about what hes written for days, couldnt get it out of my head. and so i started googling stuff around it, just looking up different terms and reading forums. the more i read the more i felt this connection to it yeah like ive been walking around with a key in my pocket for years without knowing there was a door right next to me all along. its kinda intense you know? ive never told anyone else about this because its so new, only discovered by myself recently and its scary telling someone who might not understand or worse just dismisses it as some weird phase i have. but now that i am comfortable with the idea of it existing inside my head its hard to ignore anymore