...Little Mistakes...

So I've been in this little-space thing for about five years now. It's a bit of an oddity to get into but it just feels so natural, you know? My daddy is such a strong presence, always there when I need him... which is often. I mean, let's face it, being twenty-eight and still asking someone to tuck me in at night isn't exactly the most common thing. But he gets it. He gets me. Anyway, one time last year, we had this big dinner party with friends, some of his colleagues, people like that. The usual stuff... but there I was, all dressed up as a little girl for him... just because it made him happy. And everyone knew about the dynamic and everything seemed fine. They were all kind, you know? Just nodding along, making conversation... But then it happened. We had some wine, lots of laughs... and I started to feel that playful buzz mixed with a bit of nervousness too. So I asked him if he could put me in my crib for the night. It's this cute little bed with stuffed animals everywhere, a real nursery setup he made just for these moments. Now, when we're at home, we can do whatever and everyone respects that. But last year... it was like my inhibitions were gone. And I said it in front of everyone. Oh man, the room went deathly silent. I looked around... some were smiling uncomfortably, others had their heads down, pretending to text on their phones... Daddy just gave me this look that told me to keep quiet, which, let's be honest, is usually a look for something naughty and not necessarily embarrassing. But this time it was clear: 'stop talking'. And I did... but the damage had been done. It took weeks to shake off that awkward feeling. We talked about it later, and he said everyone understood, just felt a bit awkward too. But here's me thinking, was it really worth it? The truth is, even though we're both adults, and everything is consensual... sometimes it feels like I'm taking some big risks by being who I am... So yeah, this confession thing kinda helps clear my head about these little things that happen. Maybe next time I'll be a bit more careful with the timing or something. ...