A Moment of Weakness

I've been struggling to stay patient with my little one recently. We've had a tough day, and I snapped when she wouldn't listen after being warned multiple times. The last straw was when I put her over my knee for an overdue spanking, it felt... satisfying, oddly so. It’s not something that fits the nurturing image of me I try to uphold as her primary caregiver. Am I wrong for finding discipline pleasurable? Should I seek help or is this just a phase?