Slacking Off During Shifts Is My Guilty Secret

As a bartender, I pride myself on being reliable and professional. However, there’s this recurring habit of mine that always gets me in trouble. When the bar is busy and people are clamoring for their drinks, I find myself sneaking off to the back room under the pretense of restocking glasses or cleaning inventory. The truth is, I often get lost in thoughts about kinkier scenarios when things slow down, fantasies that can distract me from my duties. One night, while everyone was watching soccer on the TVs, I slipped into the bathroom and locked myself in for a good ten minutes longer than necessary to collect my thoughts and jot down some ideas for my latest fantasies. My shift partner came looking for me, and when she asked where I’d been, I fibbed about getting water from the tap at the back of the bar. It was just such an unnecessary lie because it’s not like anyone noticed the extra minute or two without me. But something in that moment felt so wrong, I broke a rule, even if it wasn’t explicitly stated as one, and that’s what haunts me more than anything else.