Recent Discovery and Curiosity

I recently got divorced after eight years of marriage, nothing dramatic, just growing apart. Now I have this strange new interest that came out of nowhere. A few weeks ago, it hit me while I was alone in my apartment on a rainy Saturday afternoon. Suddenly, I found myself daydreaming about being spanked by someone older and more experienced. It felt so foreign yet strangely compelling. This isn't something I’ve ever been into before, but now that I have the space to explore these thoughts, it’s consuming me. I haven’t acted on any of this just yet, I’m scared to admit even to myself how much I’d like to try it out in real life with someone who can actually play a dominant role. It’s confusing and exhilarating at the same time. Maybe it’s because I’ve been single for so long, but the idea of being controlled in some way is oddly appealing. I know I’m not alone, right? There must be other people like me who suddenly find themselves interested in this after years of never having thought about such things. Am I just going through a phase here, or could this be something deeper that’s been dormant all these years? It seems so sudden and random, but the more I think about it, the less crazy it feels to explore. I’d love to hear from anyone else who might relate or has advice for someone at this stage. Is there anything wrong with me for suddenly wanting to try something new like this after being monogamous for such a long time? I’m just trying to understand my own mind right now.