Mommy's Discipline Session

I'm in my thirties now and I've embraced the Mommy/Daddy dynamic with my partner. It’s a way for us to explore boundaries, mutual respect, and a bit of playful control. Tonight was particularly intense; after some heated words, he found himself in timeout, kneeling beside his bed, while I stood over him like an authority figure should. The look on his face said it all, he knew what was coming and that he deserved this consequence. Once the moment passed, we cuddled up together with a newfound understanding of each other's needs. But now, I'm wondering, is there a specific way to measure if the discipline part is too much or not enough? How do others in our community gauge balance?